If You’re Not Feeling, Neither Is Your Audience
I have seen it time and time again.
And no doubt you have, too.
A business professional steps in front of an audience to speak—and suddenly turns into an automaton.
Her delivery is stilted and unemotional. Her body hangs like a limp noodle—or jerks and stutters. Her words lack focus and intent. Her energy is indifferent.
Disengaged.
The result?
A lackluster presentation.
And an audience that shuts down and pulls away.
Watching a speaker—a leader—like this, you might presume:
She obviously doesn’t care about the material or know it well.
She’s not as prepared or rehearsed as she needs to be.
She doesn’t really want to be here and connect with us.
But what if you presumed wrong?
What if she actually knew the subject inside and out, cared deeply about it, and had spent hours rehearsing the material?
What if all of that were true—and she still showed up like an emotionless wooden toy?
As a presentation coach and trainer, that would tell me that somewhere between what she feels on the inside and what she communicates on the outside, there’s a disconnect.
It’s as if the current to her passion and purpose has been switched off.
So why does this happen?
Fear Can Shut Down Your Authentic Presence
Fear.
Fear that says:
Don’t reveal too much.
Don’t risk too much.
Don’t let them see too much of you.
What if they don’t like what they see?
This kind of fear makes it easier to batten down the hatches than to show up and share.
And so, the veneer snaps into place.
The body armors up.
Emotion gets shoved down.
The palette of colors that makes you uniquely you gets tossed aside in favor of safe beige.
And when this happens—when you capitulate to fear by trying to protect yourself from your audience’s judgment—you cut yourself off from the very things that would allow your audience to connect with you.
The speaker isn’t disengaged because she doesn’t care. She may be disengaged because she cares so much that she starts protecting herself.
That distinction matters.
Because authentic audience engagement doesn’t begin with what you say.
It begins with how fully you are willing to show up.
First, Free the Instrument
As I learned long ago in my professional acting classes, when the body is tense and armored, your breath becomes constricted.
And when you’re not breathing with ease, you’re not thinking with ease.
The more physically shut down you are, the less access you have to your emotions—and the more difficult it becomes to let those emotions flow naturally through your voice, body, and words.
That’s why the first thing I do when working with a coaching client like the speaker I’ve described is help them release the tension in their body through targeted relaxation work.
The goal isn’t simply to “relax.”
It’s to free the instrument.
Your body is your instrument as a speaker.
Your breath, voice, face, posture, movement, and energy all contribute to how your message is experienced.
The more physically relaxed you become, the more present you become.
And the more present you become, the more able you are to express yourself authentically.
Second, Reconnect to Your Intention
Once the body is relaxed and the physical armor has been shed, I turn my client’s attention to the reason, purpose, and intention behind their presentation.
What are you there to DO in relationship to your audience—whether that audience is one person or one thousand?
Why does this matter to you as a speaker?
And perhaps most importantly:
Why does this matter to your audience?
These questions shift you away from simply delivering information and toward actually communicating with people.
And if the speaker is willing to connect that intention to what I call their SoulRole®—the reason they are here on this planet—the flame of their passion (and their Charismatic Presence®) expands.
And when that flame expands, so does their ability to persuade, engage, and connect.
To Connect With Your Audience, You Must Be Willing to Be Vulnerable
Connecting with your audience requires a degree of vulnerability.
Not vulnerability in the sense of revealing deep, dark personal secrets or becoming overly emotional.
Rather, it is the willingness to let people see and feel what matters to you.
That might mean allowing your enthusiasm to show.
Letting your concern be visible.
Speaking with conviction.
Allowing your face and body to reflect the meaning behind your words.
Taking the risk of caring enough that your audience can actually tell you care.
I consider this kind of vulnerability a worthy risk.
Because your willingness to feel—and to show up—allows your audience to feel and show up in return.
It breaks through barriers.
It creates connection.
And it transforms a presentation from an exchange of information into an experience.
Your Audience Can Feel Your Level of Engagement
Think about the speakers you’ve found most compelling.
Chances are, you weren’t captivated simply because they had excellent slides or perfectly memorized their talking points.
You felt something.
You could sense that they cared.
Their energy told you that what they were saying mattered.
Their voice carried intention.
Their body was alive.
They were with you.
That is a critical part of leadership presence.
People don’t simply listen to your words.
They experience you while you’re saying them.
And that experience influences whether they trust you, believe you, remember your message, and want to engage with you.
As a Speaker and Leader, It’s Your Responsibility to Turn Thyself On
The last of my Five Principles of Charismatic Presence is:
Turn Thyself On So You Can Turn Others On.
It means you are responsible for switching on the current that magnifies your presence when you speak to a group.
It means doing everything you can to bring your voice, energy, emotions, and physical body to aliveness.
Because when it comes down to it, igniting your Charismatic Presence is your responsibility.
Your audience can’t do it for you.
The room can’t do it for you.
Your PowerPoint certainly can’t do it for you.
You have to bring yourself to life first.
And the more you Turn Thyself On—emotionally and otherwise—the more you invite your audience to become engaged, curious, energized, and emotionally connected.
That’s when presentations become positive, indelible experiences.
For both you and the members of your fortunate audience.
The Charismatic Presence® Principle Takeaway
If You’re Not Feeling, Neither Is Your Audience.
So be willing to feel.
Be willing to show up.
Be willing to let your audience see what matters to you.
Free the instrument.
Reconnect to your intention.
Take the worthy risk of vulnerability.
Turn yourself on—and you invite your audience to come alive with you.
Want to Strengthen Your Leadership Presence?
For more about cultivating the inner presence that helps you show up at your best when the moment matters most, I invite you to read my cornerstone article, Leadership Presence Comes From Within, part of my blog series, The Charismatic Leader.
You can also explore the concept of Charismatic Presence more deeply in my third book, Charismatic Presence: 5 Principles For Magnetic Presentations.
To learn more about my books, presence and presentation coaching programs, training programs, and keynote offerings, visit my website.
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